24 hours

i did what i usually do when i am in a mental dilemma or struggle.
i went running in the cold dark windy night of melbourne. running makes my mind clear and focused..as i ran and puffed into the wind thats biting on my face, it forces me to think of the issue deeply and in a calm and collected perspective.

i woke up feeling darn negative, when Ain called me coz she be late meeting me for lects, she could sense that i was upset?i didn't realise it myself..but i guessed i sounded snappy...such a prick for being a dickhead..it so happened that she broke off with her bf just a few hours ago...which is kinda the reason why she was late...poor gal...ended up she had to lift me out of my doldrums...funny isit not?that sometimes u find strength and sanity helping others when you are bleeding yourself?

we talked about self preservation, cynicism and wallowing in self despair ...i could see she getting emo man...
fortunately its wonderous what chocolate or in this case snickers can do to a gal feeling down?
i am glad i made her smile abit after sharing some of my perspectives about relationships in particular, religion and relationships.

what others do at times is they recognise that IT takes a greater person to recognise that things are not going well or end up well and they take steps to end the relationship even though it hurts them alot? they know that both parties and they themselves will end up being hurt after the split..even if it hurts them more...some of these clear headed souls do make the most painful of decisions...

we all want love and relationships simple, dreamy and cheery...often they are...but sometimes they are not..do we lose hope in r.s then?
no..i dun think so..
laterz guys..need to eat..i am hungry after the run!

it feels great to be alive and being able to love! theres no meaning if we lose any of these two mysteries in life!

its been a while since i blogged..haha i wonder why?perhaps no longer do i need to keep my emotions and thoughts to myself?no longer o i feel distant from home and my loved ones?yes physically i am far away..but this trip home during the winter holidays has made me closer to them then ever before. i spoke to my dad, hoping that he will once again have the courage and drive to start working again and prayed constantly for him and mum also. by a strange twist of good fortune, i found something which i thought was beyond my control. such a pleasant surprise, it made me feel sunny and chirpy the whole day long..even though it was a cold and usually wet day in melbourne. perhaps all it takes sometimes is effort and a stroke of good luck..haha..well, i am missing the sunny weather of spore already..i wish all of u could come and stay here awhile.heee..time time time..so quick and its almost the weekend..i wonder if hongda will survive his chalet without alchohol poisoning..heehehee..stay tuned folks, feel free to drop me an email anytime!

i am back in melbourne...cold...cold...and a heavy heart..back to studies.. i'll be back soon..take care people.

i don't feel too good.it should be a good day. my folks finally succumbed to my nagging and went together for a stroll around the blocks with me, i should be proud and i am..i hope they keep this going, i feel they are closer too, i am glad i came back this semester..its been a very packed holiday for me and i got more then i what i expected.somethings worked out well, others not how i want it to be, but thats life ain't it?i came back and like when i just left, i am over the limit with emo luggage. can't bear to leave?u bet!can't wait to return?in a way yes too!when even in the midst of alchohol and i am not excited, something must be wrong!ahahaahha...i want to rip out my heart and cast it aside...life will never be the same again...i will miss u guys.

met up with nara, pauline, jimmy. wan-ni and travis earlier for dinner at 85 at bedok..shiok man..haha had bar chor mee, pig organs soup, chickie wings...no wonder i am getting fat!haha oh well, realised too that i am the only single person present at dinner!warrau..emotional low then..anyway..met up with chloe too and went for one of the SOKA friendship meetings at tampines..quite insightful and emotionally evoking as some of the members shared their testimonials, one of the guy speakers testimonial was especially heart wrenching ..n i almost teared..perhaps i am worried too for my mums health..i shall pray for her well being..pretty soon i wun be around spore to be here for her..and for her to pester me to massage her!wahhaha...=P hey..lazy la at times..keke =O hmm still in my search for the religion in which i wish to place my faith in..well..how do u decide?hmm..i guess like someone said..dun take too long to decide..i shall indeed try and see if it does improve my state of mind and life in general..but is that the right way to assess what is a good religion?indecisive?...just want to be sure and not rewards focused...time to go...mind running in circles..chasing....where are u? am i destined to be like the lonesome leaf during winter?all by itself...

time..i am running out of it..i have no ticket to get back to melbourne..thanks to an extreme case of miscommunication between SQ and myself...and now all i can do is call everyday and make my case to them..to which they will reply...we are waitlisting you on these flights..we will contact you as soon as you are confirmed with a seat sir..sounds good enough..only thing..uni starts in two weeks time..and i have not even bought my textbooks yet..broke broke broke..time and money..they say you can almost trade off these two commodoties..only problem..i dun hv either of these to spare..so tell me...am i screwed or what..do you find this familiar?well..everytime i pass this place..i think of you.

and henry is telling aw all about hw the milky way is actually one big pool of intergalatic spunk...aw seems excited at the mention of spunk..=P

me and edwin...whacking more food!bah KUT TEH! yeahh...i love soups! dun nid to ask...soup..sure on!hahah i wonder where my fellow soup lover is at this moment?keke =P

it seems the latest 4D betting slips have been enlarged and betting been xtended to late hours..heres some of us busy filling in the immigration cards..HUH need to fill in meh asks henry..oh well..who else to ask such questions?hahaha..

another group of hungry sporean diners feasting on seafood like theres no tomorrow..hahaha..iodine overdose..=P hongda looks happy!is he gonna get some tonight?jiesheng looks like my dad in the 70s.hahah john and wife to be soon clara..edwin..hmm...looks constipated...hahah great to see u all guys!