i am tired

i am tired..thats all i have to say.

遙望

alrite!almost done with the second of three essays..
it may not be a fantastic essay, but i am glad theres good progress
gonna get some shuteye soon

just some thoughts on my mind===>

could there ever be a situation that makes you feel so 'disconnected' with someone you used to share time and conversations before?
why or how come theres a stigma thats attached to the event thats changed the way two individuals came to be where and how they are today?
recalled the process in eternal sunshine of a spotless mind..will having such memories erased take away the stigma?
or are we just victims of our own doing?

they should be closer then this..yet somehow (unfathomable)..an invisible barrier lies in between the sum of one plus one.
the saddest part of the day is thinking of the occasions two individuals were physically located in close proximity but the feeling was that the other being distant and foreign...that of a thousand miles

with one yearning and looking over the horizon
for the feeling that's lost.

每天多麼多麼的需要
永遠與你抱擁著
忘掉世間一切痛苦悲哀
縱使分開分開多麼遠
也會聽到你呼喚
期待我這一生再會你

+and the reason is YOUUUUuuu+ ~hoobastank

ohh man...the busted knee from last year's AHM mishap is back to haunt me!
wah lau ehz..
everytime i seem to make some progress, my body lets me down.

anyone willing to donate their knee?
i dun think mine is gonna last.
overhaul required


starting on my terrorism essay- focusing on the arab israeli conflict and the al qa'ida and US/iraq situation.

i wonder who's that guy in that foto she posted...
why do some people always miss out that opportunity that allows them to get together?
cruel twist of fate takes someone away and upon return the sentiments are not suitable for relationships anymore.
either u can't face that person anymore, having said no to you before. ( or was it just you, who didn't try hard enough?)
even if you could put it all aside..the other party faces a dilemma and could chose to let absence diffuse the tension.

after both have recuperated from their emotional wounds and moral conflicts.
things have changed..can the two still face each other without the stigma of what happened or what didn't happen?

was in a spot of photography today.

waiting for a star to fall

it was about 14 degrees or less? earlier..but i was hoping to go for a run since wednesday, the weather these few days had not been the best for running, cold winds and rain. so this evening's plan to run was impaired by the shower that came at about 5pm..fortunately it stopped around 6 and though it was cold, i was really itching to run.

with the passion that warmed me ( for a while la..ahha), i attempted to run as fast as i could around the park thats near my house, i do not know the actual distance, but on the street directory it seem like at least 2.4km.
i am still harbouring thoughts of getting my ippt done with this june when i return..although i run twice a week, a long run of 7km and a short run of 2.4km, i am still worried about maintaining this till the end of the year.

and thus i ran...and it was around 10.18
hmm not so bad i thought..now i just need to shave off 20 seconds..haha forgive me..i really want to get that gold and prove to myself i can go on to bigger things, which i almost got last year ..but tat was before i nicked my knee and had to hobble ( not hobbit ) the 21km they call the AHM.

keeping fingers crossed and joints healthy..i be trying again.
hmm my heart is beating so fast...is it for someone whom i have been pinning for?haha
fate is twisted at times, either they are with someone else or they are in a dimension whereby they just want to be by themselves.
no just in case, its not about just one person..its just me..now.how many such cases already?

ooh..i am using my other hand ..that must be a new record. haha

moving on to the next essay, anyone like to talk about the arab and israeli conflict?

porto are the champions of europe

oh man..
was up yesterday watching the champions league final..
but i fell asleep ( too tired ) before even seeing any goals.
and when i woke up it was already over...and some news was on.
was really cold coz i fell asleep without a blanket on..and ran to bed to sleep it off.

i was just wondering..were the guys in camp up as well?catching the match?
those nites of drinks and mee goreng supper with luncheon meat.HAHA

you could never beat that for male bonding.seriously
why not get out and out of this state of boredom and lonliness u say?

its hard when u are broke and need to watch your spending. disagree?i'll prove you wrong.

gonna do more readings for my other two essays.

last day of semester today. from now..its essays and exam preparation mode..of course i am always distracted by other things..heehee =P

looking at cheah's photos made me hungry..for steamboat..hahaha

yipeeee hiyo!

i am just about to complete one out of three essays..two more to go.


gonna grab some rest now and start on the other one straight away..
trying to find some time amongst the rush to study for my exam too LAH..

optus bills are killing me..they are so messy and always get bills wrong..
singapore owned further more.HAH

see you all soon.

It is strange to think, I haven't seen you for awhile. I have seen the new moon, but not you. I have seen sunsets and sunrises, but nothing of your beautiful face. I miss you like the sun misses the flower; like the sun misses the flower in the depths of winter. Instead of beauty to direct its light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world your absence has banished me to. Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and the night. The hope that after your gone from my sight, it will not be the last time that I look upon you.

runs?

i think i overdid it..ran too much..now i have the runs..

argh..ouch..erghhhhdarnit..
i'm feeling ooozy man...sheesh

besides the 'pain' i am going through now..
heres something i wish to share with all of you.
especially my dearest female friends

this is especially sweet..and i wonder where i can find this author..for i want to thank her..haha


Ode to the Nice Guys
This rant was written for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

blues

bad case of the monday blues.

i feel really lethargic and worst...not been productive with essays today.
gonna wrap up one of them by wednesday and then begin working on the other two asap.
still have one exam paper to study for.

keeping my fingers crossed too..
1)earlier flight back home
2)the guys make up their mind to go Thailand

...the fried rice is making me feel bloated..
gotta go run it off...

run run run run run run